Grouping all middle school boys as reacting the same to any event is ignoring the past 20 years of behavior genetic research. At least a third are resilient enough not to be affected. A third are much less sensitive and miss this type social cue. This leaves one third that may be affected. That sensitive group would benefit from your post. Alarming the parents of the other 2/3 is deleterious.
This is a fair and well-informed observation, and we appreciate you bringing it. Differential sensitivity is real, and you are right that boys do not respond to social exclusion in a uniform way. No good developmental research suggests otherwise.
What we would offer in return is this: parents are generally quite good at knowing which category their son falls into. A piece like this is not meant to send every caregiver into alarm. It is meant to give language and context to the ones who already sense that something is off but cannot quite name it. For that group, the framing matters enormously. For the others, it simply does not apply, and most parents will know the difference.
We are always grateful when readers bring additional research into the conversation. It makes the work better, and it is exactly the kind of exchange this community is built for.
Your intention is wonderful and you bring needed information but I have seen too many parents that overreact to generalized blanket statements and those parents were not as good at defining their teens mental state. It’s the space around the chair,not the chair I worry as much about.
Grouping all middle school boys as reacting the same to any event is ignoring the past 20 years of behavior genetic research. At least a third are resilient enough not to be affected. A third are much less sensitive and miss this type social cue. This leaves one third that may be affected. That sensitive group would benefit from your post. Alarming the parents of the other 2/3 is deleterious.
This is a fair and well-informed observation, and we appreciate you bringing it. Differential sensitivity is real, and you are right that boys do not respond to social exclusion in a uniform way. No good developmental research suggests otherwise.
What we would offer in return is this: parents are generally quite good at knowing which category their son falls into. A piece like this is not meant to send every caregiver into alarm. It is meant to give language and context to the ones who already sense that something is off but cannot quite name it. For that group, the framing matters enormously. For the others, it simply does not apply, and most parents will know the difference.
We are always grateful when readers bring additional research into the conversation. It makes the work better, and it is exactly the kind of exchange this community is built for.
Your intention is wonderful and you bring needed information but I have seen too many parents that overreact to generalized blanket statements and those parents were not as good at defining their teens mental state. It’s the space around the chair,not the chair I worry as much about.